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Nero Wolfe’s Brownstone: Stay at Home – Days 45 & 46

Nero Wolfe’s Brownstone: Stay at Home – Days 45 & 46

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So, in 2020, as the Pandemic settled in like an unwanted relative who just came for a week and is still tying up the bathroom, I did a series of posts for the FB Page of the Nero Wolfe fan club, The Wolfe Pack. I speculated on what Stay at Home would be like for Archie, living in the Brownstone with Nero Wolfe, Fritz Brenner, and Theodore Horstmann. I have already re-posted days one through thirty-nine. Here are days forty-five (May 5) and forty-six (May 6). It helps if you read the series in order, so I’ve included links to the earlier entries.

Day Forty Five – 2020 Stay at Home

“WHAT is this?”

I looked back at Nero Wolfe as I went to my desk. “Your beer. What does it look like?” I had just put the tray on his desk.

“This most certainly is not my beer, Archie. What is this flummery?”

“Well, sir, it is Cinco de Mayo.”

“Archie…”

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Nero Wolfe’s Brownstone: Stay at Home – Days 42 & 43

Nero Wolfe’s Brownstone: Stay at Home – Days 42 & 43

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So, in 2020, as the Pandemic settled in like an unwanted relative who just came for a week and is still tying up the bathroom, I did a series of posts for the FB Page of the Nero Wolfe fan club, The Wolfe Pack. I speculated on what Stay at Home would be like for Archie, living in the Brownstone with Nero Wolfe, Fritz Brenner, and Theodore Horstmann. I have already re-posted days one through thirty-nine. Here are days forty-two (May 2) and forty-three (May 3). It helps if you read the series in order, so I’ve included links to the earlier entries.

Day Forty Two – 2020 Stay at Home

Lewis Hewitt called early this morning, which was a surprise. He was more prone to call after lunch or in the evening. Wolfe would say that he was excitable. But that didn’t really matter, because my employer was upstairs in the plant room; spending money, not earning it. I had only just entered the office after breakfast in the kitchen with Fritz, when the phone rang. “Nero Wolfe’s Office, Archie Goodwin speaking.”

“Archie, this is Lewis Hewitt. I must speak with Wolfe.” Now, normally, he would say ‘Mister Wolfe’ in this situation. And his voice would be a lot calmer than it sounded.

“Being the orchid fancier that you are, you know that he’s in the plant rooms upstairs from nine until eleven, every day but Sunday. And Sunday it ain’t.”

“Yes, yes, I know, Archie. But I need his help. He needs to come out here to my house.”

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Nero Wolfe’s Brownstone: Stay at Home – Days 40 & 41

Nero Wolfe’s Brownstone: Stay at Home – Days 40 & 41

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So, in 2020, as the Pandemic settled in like an unwanted relative who just came for a week and is still tying up the bathroom, I did a series of posts for the FB Page of the Nero Wolfe fan club, The Wolfe Pack. I speculated on what Stay at Home would be like for Archie, living in the Brownstone with Nero Wolfe, Fritz Brenner, and Theodore Horstmann. I have already re-posted days one through thirty-nine. Here are days forty (April 30) and forty-one (May 1). It helps if you read the series in order, so I’ve included links to the earlier entries.

Day Forty– 2020 Stay at Home

Saul called today. The governor announced that he was releasing some prisoners due to excessive coronavirus exposure in the prisons. And as Lon had predicted, Arthur Goldstein was one of them. Wolfe had brought Saul in late in the case to try and get him for killing the guard. Saul, who rarely comes up short, and hates doing so even more than I do – if that’s possible – hadn’t been able to get what we wanted.

“Instead of him getting the chair, he’s going home.”

“Yeah. That’s an itch I’d like to scratch.”

“Maybe we’ll get lucky and he’ll do something stupid, now that he’s out,” Saul mused.

“That would be an early birthday present.”

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Nero Wolfe’s Brownstone: Stay at Home – Day 39

Nero Wolfe’s Brownstone: Stay at Home – Day 39

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So, in 2020, as the Pandemic settled in like an unwanted relative who just came for a week and is still tying up the bathroom, I did a series of posts for the FB Page of the Nero Wolfe fan club, The Wolfe Pack. I speculated on what Stay at Home would be like for Archie, living in the Brownstone with Nero Wolfe, Fritz Brenner, and Theodore Horstmann. I have already re-posted days one through thirty-eight. Here is day thirty nine (April 29). It helps if you read the series in order, so I’ve included links to the earlier entries.

Day Thirty Nine– 2020 Stay at Home

Fritz doesn’t like to freeze meat, which is understandable for a master chef – certainly one who is cooking for Nero Wolfe. But with pork-processing plants shutting down all over the country, he took delivery this morning of enough pork to last us awhile.

I offered to help him organize and store it all, but he declined. Fritz keeps complete control of his well-ordered kitchen. I sat down at my breakfast table with a small pitcher of milk and amused myself by watching him. Fritz sometimes does a one-man running commentary on his kitchen operations, in a mix of Swiss and English. It’s better than television. …

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Nero Wolfe’s Brownstone: Stay at Home – Day 36

Nero Wolfe’s Brownstone: Stay at Home – Day 36

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So, last year, as the Pandemic settled in like an unwanted relative who just came for a week and is still tying up the bathroom, I did a series of posts for the FB Page of the Nero Wolfe fan club, The Wolfe Pack. I speculated on what Stay at Home would be like for Archie, living in the Brownstone with Nero Wolfe, Fritz Brenner, and Theodore Horstmann. I have already re-posted days one through thirty. Here is thirty six (April 26). It helps if you read the series in order, so I’ve included links to the earlier entries.

Day Thirty Six – 2020 Stay at Home

Theodore took a cab to do some grocery shopping for his sister. I told Fritz to make sure he took a long shower when he got back, and to not touch anything, or spread his clothes around. We didn’t need him bringing anything into the house from his day out.

The Giants chose a tackle in the third round, on day two of the draft. After taking a tackle in the first round (with the fourth overall pick). That team makes me shake my head from the draft through the final game. Said final game rarely taking place in the playoffs.

After lunch, I asked Wolfe if he wanted to play pool. He ignored me.

Fritz didn’t go out today, so we played a few games of Yahtzee in the front room. His accent is almost adorable when he says ‘Yaht-zeeeee!’

 

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Nero Wolfe’s Brownstone: Stay at Home – Days 34 and 35

Nero Wolfe’s Brownstone: Stay at Home – Days 34 and 35

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So, in 2020, as the Pandemic settled in like an unwanted relative who just came for a week and is still tying up the bathroom, I did a series of posts for the FB Page of the Nero Wolfe fan club, The Wolfe Pack. I speculated on what Stay at Home would be like for Archie, living in the Brownstone with Nero Wolfe, Fritz Brenner, and Theodore Horstmann. I have already re-posted days one through thirty. Here are days thirty four (April 24) and thirty five (April 25). It helps if you read the series in order, so I’ve included links to the earlier entries.

DAY THIRTY FOUR – 2020 Stay At Home

Don’t worry – I’m not going to start mixing bleach into my milk.

Felix called Wolfe last night. Rusterman’s gets its beef from a small group of cattle farmers upstate. So does Wolfe. The meat packing plant they all use got walloped with a virus outbreak, and it has closed down indefinitely. I’d hears some big pork plants out west were running into this problem, too. Felix was scrambling to line up a new supplier.

“Of course, there may be a slight decrease in quality, in the short term.”

“Nonsense!” Wolfe bristled at the mere thought.

“But Mister Wolfe. We will do our best, of course. But we need meat. If we tell everyone ‘No’ until we find a replacement of equal quality, we will have no meat to serve!”

“Then quit calling me and find someone. And keep me informed.”

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Nero Wolfe’s Brownstone: Stay at Home – Days 32 and 33

Nero Wolfe’s Brownstone: Stay at Home – Days 32 and 33

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So, last year, as the Pandemic settled in like an unwanted relative who just came for a week and is still tying up the bathroom, I did a series of posts for the FB Page of the Nero Wolfe fan club, The Wolfe Pack. I speculated on what Stay at Home would be like for Archie, living in the Brownstone with Nero Wolfe, Fritz Brenner, and Theodore Horstmann. I have already re-posted days one through thirty. Here are days thirty two (April 21) and thirty three (April 23). It helps if you read the series in order, so I’ve included links to the earlier entries.

DAY THIRTY TWO – 2020 Stay At Home

I saw the death totals today. New York is number one, hands down. We’ve had more deaths than the next fourteen states combined. Seven out of every hundred people confirmed to have the virus, die from it. So I won’t be taking any taxi rides just yet. Or hopping on the subway.

While I admit I miss my twice-a-week session at the barbershop – preferably on days without a cop murder on site – I don’t see the need to increase somebody else’s risk of dying because I’m not happy with my sideburns. I do look forward to getting shoe shines again, though I am more than capable of doing my own.

And by the way: don’t think that Lily and I are drifting apart. We call every other day. I just don’t see the need to jot that down regularly.

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Nero Wolfe’s Brownstone: 2020 Stay at Home – Day 31

Nero Wolfe’s Brownstone: 2020 Stay at Home – Day 31

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So, last year, as the Pandemic settled in like an unwanted relative who just came for a week and is still tying up the bathroom, I did a series of posts for the FB Page of the Nero Wolfe fan club, The Wolfe Pack. I speculated on what Stay at Home would be like for Archie, living in the Brownstone with Nero Wolfe, Fritz Brenner, and Theodore Horstmann. I have already re-posted days one through thirty. Here is day thirty one (April 20). It helps if you read the series in order, so I’ve included links to the earlier entries.

Day Thirty One – 2020 Stay at Home (SaH)

During breakfast, Fritz told me that some items were becoming scarce, or even no longer available. Granted, we didn’t exactly buy off-the-shelf goods from chain supermarkets. But it was inevitable that some things would become harder to find. Especially since Wolfe’s taste ran to imported items. Fritz assured me we were well-stocked with Greek honey.

Milk can still be found, but he did say that once in while he might have to try two or three stores. I thanked him for his efforts to keep calcium supplies up. He said that with more and more meat processing plant workers getting sick, fresh meat was soon going to become more scarce. I told him I knew that he’d do his best, but Wolfe would just have to adapt, like the rest of us. He certainly would complain about it, though.

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Nero Wolfe’s Brownstone: 2020 Stay at Home – Day 30

Nero Wolfe’s Brownstone: 2020 Stay at Home – Day 30

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So, last year, as the Pandemic settled in like an unwanted relative who just came for a week and is still tying up the bathroom, I did a series of posts for the FB Page of the Nero Wolfe fan club, The Wolfe Pack. I speculated on what Stay at Home would be like for Archie, living in the Brownstone with Nero Wolfe, Fritz Brenner, and Theodore Hortsmann. I have already re-posted days one through twenty-nine. Here is day thirty (April 19). It helps if you read the series in order, so I’ve included links to the earlier entries.

DAY THIRTY– 2020 Stay at Home

Saul called after dinner. I took my coffee into the front room and talked to him from there. I made a mental note to ask him about the online poker game. “Need a professional to step in and bail you out on that bank job? My rates are very reasonable.”

“I’ll keep you in mind if I need to farm out any work to the minors.”

“Phsaw. Fred can handle those. What are you up to? Done with the bank thing?”

“That wasn’t too tough. I’ve taken this week off and stayed in the house. Good thing I don’t have to tail anybody. There’s not much cover out there.

I laughed. The current environment would definitely challenge his tailing skills, which were better than anybody else’s that I knew.

“How is Mister Wolfe doing?”

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Nero Wolfe’s Brownstone: 2020 Stay at Home – Days 20 and 21

Nero Wolfe’s Brownstone: 2020 Stay at Home – Days 20 and 21

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So, last year, as the Pandemic settled in like an unwanted relative who just came for a week and is still tying up the bathroom, I did a series of posts for the FB Page of the Nero Wolfe fan club, The Wolfe Pack. I speculated on what Stay at Home would be like for Archie, living in the Brownstone with Nero Wolfe, Fritz Brenner, and Theodore Hortsmann. I have already reposted days one through fifteen. Here are days twenty (April 10) and twenty-one (April 11). It helps if you read the series in order, so I’ve included links to the earlier entries. I enjoy channeling Archie more than any other writing which I do.

DAY TWENTY – 2020 Stay at Home

I tried calling Inspector Cramer after breakfast, but he was out. Apparently my fellow New Yorkers are still committing homicide. I’ll call the station later in the day. I’d like to visit a crime scene and try to do some detecting.

I had more success calling the hospital to check on Bill Gore. I found out that he had gotten through the worst of it and recovered enough to be sent home. I wasn’t going to call him up, but it was good to know he had survived the virus.

It’s Good Friday. I am not religiously inclined, but I will say that I’m glad that those who are, received some hope today. That commodity seems to be in pretty short supply these days. New York City has had more deaths than all but four entire countries. Instead of 32,000 fans watching the Mets at Citi Field, they’re digging mass graves out on Hart Island. If somebody wants to believe that a man dying on a cross is good for mankind, then that’s one death I’ll tip my hat to. Just don’t expect me to kneel.

I’m generally a pretty orderly guy, and I keep my stuff neat and tidy. I don’t like messy. This lock down has given me the opportunity to really organize my things. I was moving a couple boxes around and started looking through some of my old notebooks. I saw my notes on the Adam Nicoll murder. I might type that one up if we’re stuck at home for another couple months. That’s one I worked on while I was self-employed during Wolfe’s ‘great hiatus.’ He had simply vanished as he put operation ‘Get Zeck’ into effect, without even telling me. I opened up shop for myself and kept reasonably busy until Wolfe suddenly reappeared. Lily was the source of the Nicoll case. Indirectly.

I have a Facebook account. I don’t use it much, and I could, and often do, live without it. But I do post occasionally – Often related to baseball. Today, someone left a comment on my post, letting me know they were going to snooze me for 30 days. Now, you don’t have to like what I say. It’s a free country. Well, lately it hasn’t been as free as usual, but still: Why in the world would you tell me, on my own post, that you’re snoozing me? Whether you see my posts or not isn’t going to change my day. Just do it. It reminds me of the Pharisees preaching in the Temple square, so everyone would see them. Hey – I didn’t say I haven’t read the Bible. You don’t grow up in rural Ohio and not get some religion lessons.

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