Goth Chick News: Nope, We Definitely Don’t Need It. But We’re Getting It Anyway.
Back in the “before time,” when we were able to go to trade shows in person, Black Gate photog Chris Z disappeared in the crowd at one of the largest events. When I backtracked, I found him mesmerized by a booth touting a new indie film. Normally I would be equally excited, as the passion of film makers on a micro-budget are not only an inspiration, but generally the source of highly innovative storylines. What, I wondered, had totally captured Chris Z’s attention?
Low and behold, a new horror-comedy entitled… Zombeavers.
Yes, you read that right. It was literally the tale of zombie beavers that terrorize a bunch of college kids staying at a remote cabin near a river, with enough double-entendres to choke an elephant.
With a face emanating a crazed mixture of hilarity and trouble-making, Chris Z turned to me saying, “We have GOT to cover this”
“Nope,” I said, walking away. “Literally nobody needs that.”
What I meant was, I’d never get that article passed John O. But even if I could, we still didn’t need it.
I relay this story because what I’m about to tell you is something else we absolutely do not need. We may even not-need it more than Zombeavers. But the difference is that this information isn’t likely to get censored, and its equally entertaining in that same train-wreck kind of way.
Get ready for Santa Jaws.