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Goth Chick News: The Stoker Awards Are Back, And I Need One

Goth Chick News: The Stoker Awards Are Back, And I Need One

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Gather round friends – as we’re all still stuck at home, we can at least take consolation in the idea that writers all over the world continue to have plenty of time to create stories with which to entertain us. And as always, the end of January gifts us with the most awesome reading/watching list of the year: the annual preliminary ballot list for the coolest award ever.

The Bram Stoker Awards have been presented annually since 1987, and the winners are selected by ballot from the active members of the Horror Writers Association (HWA). Several members of the HWA, including Dean Koontz, were originally reluctant to endorse such writing awards, fearing it would incite competitiveness rather than friendly admiration. The HWA therefore went to great lengths to avoid mean-spirited competition by specifically seeking out new or overlooked writers and works, and officially issuing awards not based on “best of the year” criteria but for “superior achievement,” which allows for ties.

Which is lovely and all, but I believe I would not be above doing something mean-spirited — if not downright evil — to get my hands on the award itself; a haunted house whose front door opens to reveal the category and winner.

This week the HWA announced the preliminary ballot for the 2020 Bram Stoker Awards. And whatever you do, do not call these folks nominees (yet). Only works that appear on the Stoker Award’s “Final Ballot,” to be formally announced on February 23, may be called nominees.

Therefore, the preliminary ballot achievers are…

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Goth Chick News Presents: “Tots:” A Wonderfully Uncomfortable Short Story by Peter Schneider

Goth Chick News Presents: “Tots:” A Wonderfully Uncomfortable Short Story by Peter Schneider

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Flights, edited by Al Sarrantonio (Roc, 2004). Cover by Steve Stone

In December I told you about my magical meeting with Peter Schneider, author and owner of boutique publisher Hill House Press. During the course of one of our many conversations since, Peter let me know he had written a short story called “Tots,” which he thought I would like. It had originally appeared in a 2004 collection called Flights: Extreme Visions of Fantasy edited by horror and science fiction writer Al Sarrantonio. In the introduction for “Tots,” Sarrantonio states that Peter’s sense of humor is reminiscent of National Lampoon. When Peter sent me a copy of original manuscript of “Tots,” I absolutely agreed. I’ll also add that it’s just the right amount of wrong and knew I had to share it with you.

So, reprinted here with Peter’s permission, I am excited to share…

TOTS

By Peter Schneider

It is 2:45 a.m., in the parking lot of one of the massive superstore shopping centers that have sprung up like a series of mushrooms across the country.  But the action at this time of the morning isn’t in the Barnes & Noble or Home Depot–it’s in an isolated corner of the lot, surround on two sides by security fencing and hemmed in on the remaining sides by a variety of vehicles, circled like wagons and facing inward with their headlights shining.  The halogen illumination reveals a ring, roughly twelve feet in diameter, crudely outlined on the pavement with a can of purple spray paint.  Outside the circle perhaps fifty or sixty people, mostly men but including a smattering of well-dressed women, stand and watch.  Money changes hands here–big money.  But their attention right now is on the two combatants standing within the ring, long and deadly sickle-like blades strapped securely to their right arms.  One fighter takes a tentative step in the direction of his foe and raises his hand in preparation to strike.  He’ll have to get in closer, however–his four-year-old arms aren’t long enough to deliver a killing blow from such a distance.

This is the world of totfighting.

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Goth Chick News Reviews: The Room VR: A Dark Matter by Fireproof Games

Goth Chick News Reviews: The Room VR: A Dark Matter by Fireproof Games

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A couple years back I did something I have always wanted to do: commission an ultimate gaming computer. As I work in the industry, I only had to ask a couple of my team members if they were interested in building a “sky’s the limit” device. A month and several written checks later, I had a computer I was sure could hack NASA, containing a liquid-cooled, AMD Ryzen 1800x 8-core processor, an MSI AX370 motherboard, an AMD Vega 64 8GB video card, and 11TB of storage. I named it “Winston” and my designers lit it from the inside with a red pulse light that looks like a heartbeat.

When it was delivered, I felt like Victor Frankenstein, screaming “It’s aliiiiiivvvee!”

So, what’s the point? I had my heart set on an HTC Vive virtual reality gaming system and I did not want the word “latency” to ever cross my lips. It took quite an engine to power the first generation Vive, so though I mostly wanted computer bragging rights around the Black Gate offices, I also wanted to turn my home office into my own personal holo-deck. And that’s what I did.

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Goth Chick News: In 2021, The “Stakes” Get Higher…

Goth Chick News: In 2021, The “Stakes” Get Higher…

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No surprise, I absolutely love a good vampire story. And though I’ve had a bit of an up and down relationship with Stephen King over the years, one of the “up” periods involved his book Salem’s Lot. During the year-end holidays I reread it, followed by a revisiting of the 1979 TV miniseries starring David Soul and directed by Tobe Hooper. Though it had its moments, not the least of which being the vampires themselves, I’ve always felt a little “meh” about this rendition as compared to its literary source material. The “meh” goes double for that hot mess on TNT starring Rob Lowe in 2004. This is also no surprise, as a King novel successfully translated to the screen of any size is a rare thing indeed.

Still, hope springs eternal in these matters, as shown by Carrie and The Shining, so when The Hollywood Reporter said director Gary Dauberman had signed up to bring Salem’s Lot to the big-screen, my interest was piqued.

Why? It’s not just due to Dauberman’s horror-chops, but the fact that he is also signed on to write the interpretation. To me it seems that whenever King gets involved as the screen writer, to ensure his stories are told his way, a train wreck ensues. The most recent case in point was Doctor Sleep, King’s sequel to The Shining which I enjoyed so much I’ve read it twice. But hating Stanley Kubrick’s take on his original installment, King insisted on writing the script for Doctor Sleep himself, resulting in such a disappointing theatrical interpretation that I nearly primal screamed on the way out of the theater.

Raw fish does not belong on a pizza, and Stephen King should not write movie scripts – it’s that simple.

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Goth Chick News: More True Blood? Yes Please

Goth Chick News: More True Blood? Yes Please

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The original HBO series True Blood remains one of my favorites, even through its first episode aired way back in 2008. The show was based on The Southern Vampire Mysteries novels by Charlaine Harris, which also have a special place in my heart. Harris was my very first Black Gate interview in 2003 when she came through Chicago promoting the third book in what would ultimately be thirteen. Right around that same time, director Allan Ball got stuck in an airport due to a cancelled flight and picked up book three to pass the time. Ball was just coming off another HBO success, Six Feet Under, and fell in love with Harris’ characters, thus True Blood was eventually born.

If you’re unfamiliar, both the books and the series take place in Louisiana, at a time in the not-too-distant future where vampires have “come out of the coffin” due to the invention of synthetic blood. The story follows the adventures of telepathic waitress Sookie Stackhouse who falls in love with a vampire, then encounters werewolves, fairies, witches and more as the story progresses.

True Blood was very sexy, sometimes violent and occasionally corny, making it an addictive combination. It also made Anna Paquin, Alexander Skarsgård, Joe Manganiello, and Stephen Moyer household names. If you have never seen True Blood and don’t think you have the patience to wade through all seven seasons, which are still available on HBO or for rent, at least try Season One. Of all of them, the first is pretty much a complete story in itself. At the time, Ball had no idea if the series would get resigned, so though Season Two storyline appears in the final moments of the last episode, Season One still stands on its own.

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Goth Chick News: Ray Bradbury’s “The Wish” Brings New Magic to the Holidays

Goth Chick News: Ray Bradbury’s “The Wish” Brings New Magic to the Holidays

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Just about a year ago I finally got around to writing about my first encounter with Ray Bradbury and his story “The Wish.” It isn’t one of his most famous or well known, but when it appeared in the December issue of Woman’s Day magazine in 1973, it touched my 9-year-old self in a deeply personal way. Following its appearance in Woman’s Day, “The Wish” only appeared twice more; once in a compilation called Long After Midnight, which I discovered in my subsequent youthful pursuit of all things Bradbury, and once in a format I only just discovered.

Here is where the magic comes in…

Back in October I received an unusual voicemail on my “day job” phone. The gentleman introduced himself and asked if I was the Sue Granquist who writes for Black Gate. If so, he had something for me. If not, he apologized for bothering me and then left his number for me to call. What was exceptionally strange about this is that I don’t even know my office phone number, not to mention my very strict policy of separation of church and state – no one at the day job knows about my gig at Black Gate.

So how, exactly, did this gentleman track me down there?

With curiosity killing me I rang the number back and met Peter Schneider, former Vice President at Viking Penguin, William Morrow, Prentice Hall and Grove Press; translate that to mean a titan in the publishing world. Now retired, Mr. Schneider’s last gig was as owner of a boutique publishing firm called Hill House Press. He explained that he was the publisher for and personal friend of Ray Bradbury in the ten years before Bradbury’s death in 2012. During that time, he convinced Bradbury to let him publish a limited-edition hard cover book of The Wish; limited as in fifty-two copies were made, each containing an actual photo of Bradbury’s father and a short note about the origins of the tale from Bradbury himself. Mr. Schneider explained that he had copy number 8 in his possession which he found when cleaning out the attic. That made him wonder when the story had first appeared in public so he Googled “The Wish” and what was the first listing that came up?

The article I had written about it, which appeared in Black Gate last December.

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Goth Chick News Guest Review: Revisiting My Bloody Valentine

Goth Chick News Guest Review: Revisiting My Bloody Valentine

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With “the season” officially over for 2020, the stores seem to have given Thanksgiving a miss and moved directly to reminding us it’s time to make this the most expensive Christmas ever. I therefore determined it was a fair cop to give the whole thing a pass and move directly on to Valentine’s Day. And it seemed only right to invite Goth Chick News guest writer Scott E to comment on his favorite film, while I slacked off in a carb-coma.

Take it away Scott.

The 2009 Lionsgate sequel to the 1981 classic horror film, My Bloody Valentine, was cleverly written by Todd Farmer and Zane Smith, and directed by Patrick Lussier. Jensen Ackles, Tom Adkins, Kerr Smith, Betsy Rue, Jamie King, Megan Boone and Kevin Tighe round out the talented cast. This film is one of my favorites because the flow of the scenes pulled me in from the get go, and the special effects were creative and gorier than expected. Jensen Ackles (Supernatural) plays the son of original slasher Richard John Walters (24) who returns to his hometown on the tenth anniversary of the Valentine’s night massacre that claimed the lives of 22 people.

If you’re unfamiliar with the original 1981 storyline it, like the 2009 version, takes place in a mining town, enabling several of the most terrifying scenes to be darkly claustrophobic. Apparently Lionsgate wasn’t all that keen on a sequel , but Lussier convinced the executives the 3D effects would pay off at the box office. Studio legend has it that Lionsgate brass viewed a rough cut of the 3D version and screamed like little girls, ensuring the studio’s full backing.

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Goth Chick News: Nope, We Definitely Don’t Need It. But We’re Getting It Anyway.

Goth Chick News: Nope, We Definitely Don’t Need It. But We’re Getting It Anyway.

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Santa Jaws

Back in the “before time,” when we were able to go to trade shows in person, Black Gate photog Chris Z disappeared in the crowd at one of the largest events. When I backtracked, I found him mesmerized by a booth touting a new indie film. Normally I would be equally excited, as the passion of film makers on a micro-budget are not only an inspiration, but generally the source of highly innovative storylines. What, I wondered, had totally captured Chris Z’s attention?

Low and behold, a new horror-comedy entitled… Zombeavers.

Yes, you read that right. It was literally the tale of zombie beavers that terrorize a bunch of college kids staying at a remote cabin near a river, with enough double-entendres to choke an elephant.

With a face emanating a crazed mixture of hilarity and trouble-making, Chris Z turned to me saying, “We have GOT to cover this”

“Nope,” I said, walking away. “Literally nobody needs that.”

What I meant was, I’d never get that article passed John O. But even if I could, we still didn’t need it.

I relay this story because what I’m about to tell you is something else we absolutely do not need. We may even not-need it more than Zombeavers. But the difference is that this information isn’t likely to get censored, and its equally entertaining in that same train-wreck kind of way.

Get ready for Santa Jaws.

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Goth Chick News: Prior Parasites, a Look Back at Invasion of the Body Snatchers 1956

Goth Chick News: Prior Parasites, a Look Back at Invasion of the Body Snatchers 1956

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Invasion of the Body Snatchers poster-small

It’s probably an analogy that falls firmly under the category of “graveyard humor,” but all the recent Covid headlines keeps reminding me of the tag line for the original Invasion of the Body Snatchers film from 1956:

“You’re next!”

Well, let’s certainly hope not. But the sci-fi movie we are currently all living in seems to beg for a lookback at the iconic film. These days, something about a black and white thriller seems more comforting and nostalgic than ever, and the 1956 Invasion, the very first in the list of several screen adaptations of Jack Finney’s 1954 science fiction novel The Body Snatchers, has a whole lot of backstory to explore.

First, a quick refresher on the plot.

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Goth Chick News: Tempting Fate with Gravedigger Unholy Rye

Goth Chick News: Tempting Fate with Gravedigger Unholy Rye

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Goth Chick Rye

Tamworth Distilling Company in New Hampshire has a limited addition rye on offer just in time for Halloween, which has very season-appropriate story behind it.

Tamworth, like other distilleries, uses maple syrup as an ingredient in some of its whiskies. Tamworth master distiller Jamie Oakes was onsite at a local farm observing the tapping of maples trees early one spring, when a local man on the crew stopped the other men from tapping one of the oldest trees on the farm. All he would say was, “We don’t tap that one.”

Turns out that particular tree sat smack in the middle of a small plot of ten, very worn-down headstones. Out of curiosity, and due to its extremely old appearance, Oakes undertook research to try to find out who was buried in the small plot but came up pretty much empty-handed. None of the tattered headstones showed names or dates, but property records indicated the graves belonged to early settlers from around the mid-1700s.

Like the plot of any respectable horror movie, there’s always that one guy who just can’t leave well enough alone, and Jamie Oakes is that guy. It took him a few years to convince his colleagues at Tamworth that what they really needed to do was tap that tree. And in September 2019, Tamworth Distilling released its first small batch of Graverobber Unholy Rye, a whiskey flavored with maple syrup made from the tree growing amidst those graves.

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