Black Gate

I’m glad to see that you’ve gotten here early — as we near the end of our saga, seats are going to be at a premium, and you’re fast running out of opportunities to see Frank Coughlan Jr. and Tom Tyler perform their mystic switcheroo. I mean, once this silly thing is out of the theater, it’ll be forever relegated to the realm of nostalgic memory — it’s not like anyone will be able to watch it at home sixty years from now! That would be magic…

And so, while we still have the chance, let’s join the ragged remains of the Malcolm Scientific Expedition in their struggle against the malific machinations of the sinister Scorpion in this week’s chapter of The Adventures of Captain Marvel, “Doom Ship.” Shazam! (Cough, cough…)

Pay close attention to this week’s title cards, recapping Chapter Nine; there will be a quiz after the main feature. “The Scorpion — Forces Doctor Lang to reveal the hiding place of his lens.” “Doctor Lang — Gives Betty the combination to his safe.” “Captain Marvel — Tries to warn Betty of a death trap at Lang’s home.” “Billy Batson — And Betty decide to get the lens.” Now to pick up where we left off…

Last week, we left Billy and Betty standing in front of the late Doctor Lang’s safe, unaware that two tommy guns were aimed at their backs, primed to fire as soon as the safe is opened. (They’re also unaware that Barnett and two other Scorpion men are watching them from hiding.) Just as Billy turns the safe’s dial to the last number, but before he can open the door, Barnett and his boys emerge from behind the drapes.

One of them shoves Betty out of the way. She slams against the wall and is knocked out (by the serial’s end, this woman will have suffered more concussions than Brett Favre) and then he slugs Billy on the head with a gun, laying the intrepid broadcaster out cold.

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A seat in the balcony today? Good choice — the view is great from up here, and during the slow stretches that are inevitable in any Bette Davis picture (you know, all that kissing), there’s always the fun of candy-bombing your friends down below. But before we get to any of that, there’s this week’s edge-of-your-seat installment in The Adventures of Captain Marvel, “Dead Man’s Trap.”

Three title cards will remind us of the situation at the end of the previous chapter. “Billy Batson — And Whitey accuse Doctor Lang of being the Scorpion.” “Doctor Lang — Tries to take Billy to a place of safety in his car.” “The Scorpion’s men follow in Billy’s car which has been mined.” Now for the amazing acronym that will transport you to realms of action and adventure far beyond the ken of classmates who couldn’t scare up the price of admission! Shazam!

Recapping last week’s conclusion, Lang and the unconscious Billy hurtle down the road, closely pursued by two Scorpion thugs. The goons are blissfully unaware that there’s a bomb under their hood that will detonate when they exceed fifty miles per hour. As this is going on, back at Lang’s house the gate guard (a Scorpion stooge — damn that temp service) calls the Scorpion’s head henchman, Barnett, and tells him that Lang and Batson have driven out on the Mill Valley Road; Barnett jumps in a car with two other goons to head them off.

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Ease back in your seat and take a deep breath. That’s the way. Now a handful of buttered popcorn… wash it down with a swallow of soda pop. Your week of unbearable suspense is almost over, and now you can finally find out how Billy and Betty got out of last week’s impossible situation; the answer will be revealed in today’s chapter of The Adventures of Captain Marvel, “Boomerang.” (Notice I didn’t say “if they got out.” I respect your intelligence too much for that.)

This week’s catch-up title cards on last week’s episode are brief and to the point: “The Scorpion: Plans an elaborate trap to catch Captain Marvel.” “Barnett — Holds Betty and Billy Batson in a shack at the bombing range.” Now, as the magic name of Shazam passes your lips, prepare yourself for ten cents’ worth of suspense and superheroic thrills! (No refunds.)

Last week, we left Billy and Betty tied up in the shack at the bombing range, waiting for the other shoe… er, bomb, to drop. (What? Your town doesn’t have a bombing range? Mine either. The decline in social services these days is just shameful — libraries closed every other weekend, public parks run down and neglected, no bombing ranges… ) Betty calls for Captain Marvel on the radio, but is knocked out by a falling beam when the first bomb hits. Billy, meanwhile, struggles with his bonds — and his gag.

At the last moment, using the powerful jaw muscles he’s built up over years of broadcasting, Billy works the gag loose and shouts “Shazam!” Billy Batson vanishes, to be replaced by Captain Marvel, who quickly scoops up Betty (and the chair she’s tied to — Tom Tyler’s line readings are only fair, but he’s better at heavy lifting than any actor I’ve ever seen) and exits the shack, just an instant before it’s blown to pieces by a bomb.

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Okay boys and girls, settle down. Before watching newsreel footage of Winston Churchill walking through the ruins of London or thrilling to the terrifying spectacle of Lon Chaney Jr. changing into a human Scottish Terrier in The Wolf Man, let’s Join Billy, Betty, the Scorpion, and the rest for this week’s chapter of The Adventures of Captain Marvel, “Human Targets.”

We begin with two terse title cards that will bring everyone up to date. “The Scorpion — Tricks Bentley and Fisher into revealing the hiding place of their lenses.” “Captain Marvel — Saves Bentley’s lens and hurries to Fisher’s estate.” Now speak the wizard’s name and let his arcane arts give you powers so great that you need never fear for your lunch money again!

In a flashback to last week’s episode, we see Captain Marvel arrive at Fisher’s “estate” (to me it just looks like a big house that needs painting and must be hard to heat) and break down the door as the Scorpion hides behind the drapes. When he grabs the lens, the World’s Mightiest Mortal is knocked out by Fisher’s electrical protection apparatus. He drops to the floor, joining the unconscious Whitey and the dead Fisher.

The Scorpion pries the lens out of Captain Marvel’s hand and hightails it out of there. (Only the most cynical child would say that the fabulous artifact of the lost Scorpion Dynasty looks like a painted wooden dowel with shiny stickers stuck on each end.)

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Congratulations on squeezing a dime out of your notoriously stingy dad, and successfully ditching your twerpy kid brother on the way to the show. You’ve proven your worthiness and can now lean back and enjoy today’s chapter of The Adventures of Captain Marvel, “Lens of Death.” (You can’t put your feet up, not just because you’d get in trouble with the ushers, but because the floor is so sticky you’d leave your shoes behind if you tried.)

By this point, mid-way through the serial, the filmmakers know that attention spans are waning, so we’re down to a mere two title cards to catch up those who dozed through last week’s episode (which we covered here). “The Scorpion – Forces Owens to lead Billy Batson into the Harrison mine tunnel.” “Captain Marvel – Unmasks the Scorpion and finds a loud speaker concealed in a dummy.” Now say the magic name and gain the fabulous power of forgetting all the chores that are waiting for you at home!

A flashback to last week’s searing cliffhanger shows an increasingly agitated Captain Marvel trying to find a way out of the Harrison mine as the Scorpion and his stooges turn the power of the lenses on the entrance, melting the rock and sending a river of steaming lava gushing through the tunnels. Trapped, the World’s Mightiest Mortal backs against a wall, a look of dismay on his face. (Our hero certainly can’t be frightened – he just knows that it’ll be a big pain getting that tight-fisted old Shazam to pop for the bill if this costume needs to be dry-cleaned.)

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Now that the ushers have gathered all of the popcorn boxes left from the last show and have safely withdrawn, settle back in your seats. Let the lights go dim and the fun begin; it’s time for this week’s edge-of-your seat episode in The Adventures of Captain Marvel. Today’s chapter: “The Scorpion Strikes.”

Four title cards will enlighten those who were napping last week. “The Scorpion — Traps Billy Batson in Chan Lal’s curio shop.” “Betty — Is held prisoner at the N Street Garage by the Scorpion’s men.” “Barnett — Is forced to tell Captain Marvel where Betty is being held.” “Captain Marvel — Races to her rescue.”

Now, let the arcane arts of the Wizard Shazam transport you to realms of action and adventure undreamed of by those who chose to stay home and play stickball or have a tea party in the backyard with their dolls. Say the name!

A flashback to last week’s nail-biting conclusion shows Betty, unconscious in her car, hurtling down the garage ramps as Captain Marvel speeds to the scene. The life-size flying model is used to show his approach, its cape rippling in the wind as it moves diagonally downward across the front of the garage building. The landing is very nicely done, with stuntman Davy Sharpe alighting on the ground after a drop of at least ten feet; the film is slowed very slightly as is usual in these shots, and the result is quite effective — we’re convinced that Captain Marvel has just flown in. As with all of the flying effects in the serial, this sequence is a top-notch combination of stunts and model work.

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All right, you kids — put those squirt guns away and stop throwing that popcorn; it’s time for this week’s exciting chapter of The Adventures of Captain Marvel. Today’s thrilling episode: “Death Takes the Wheel.”

Three title cards should bring any late arrivals up to speed. “The Scorpion – Sends his men to Oak Mountain Lodge for Carlyle’s lens.” “Billy Batson – Tries to beat them to the Lodge in his plane.” “Whitey – Fails to warn Billy that his plane will blow up at one minute past eight.” Now, speak the magic word and gain the wisdom of Solomon, the strength of Hercules, the stamina of… whew! I’m bushed. Never mind the rest; let’s get started!

In a flashback to the end of last week’s segment, a grinning Billy wings his way to Oak Mountain Lodge to retrieve the lens from Carlyle’s safe, blissfully unaware that an “atmospheric exploder” has been planted in his plane, while an agitated Whitey (there were a lot of them around in the 40’s) desperately tries to radio a warning to his friend. Neither he nor Billy knows that the plane’s radio wires have been cut.

As the time for detonation approaches, Billy glances down and sees the dangling wires; he reaches down and twists them together, restoring the connection just in time to hear Whitey say, “There’s a bomb wired to explode in your plane at one minute past eight! Bail out!”

On hearing this, Billy wastes no time in saying “Shazam!” Now transformed into Captain Marvel, he immediately opens the door and leaps from the plane, showing solidarity with all those who have ever been presented with a warmed-over airline turkey meal or an in-flight movie starring Rob Schneider. The airplane explodes (hope your insurance was paid up, Billy) and Captain Marvel flies away unhurt.

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