Sharknado 6: It’s About Time (The Asylum/Syfy Films, 2018), and Great White (Piccadilly Pictures, 2021)

So, here we go. A new watch-a-thon, this one based on a handful of the 500+ shark movies that I haven’t seen (or gave up on). I’m not holding out much hope for these — shark movies are, on the whole, awful, but I know for a fact that some of these are among the worst films ever made. This 20-film marathon is me just trying to understand why they get made, bought and streamed.

Sharknado 6: It’s About Time (2019) Prime

What kind of shark? Lots of CG sharks and some ropey dinosaurs.

How deep is the plot? 10 meters.

Anyone famous get eaten? Only beans. Hasbeans.

You can pretty much read my last review (for Sharknado 5) to get the gist of this one. This time, however, they decided against scraping the bottom of the D-lister barrel, and employed a couple of C-listers, with some E-listers scattered in for good measure.

It’s all very familiar, a nutzoid story littered with sub-par CG and plenty of scenery chewing, but it was still fun, and actually had a nice bit of timey-wimey plot paradox to prop up the proceedings. For the last in the series, it was surprisingly short on shark action, and the third act felt like it was written by a fourth-grader who has just tried coffee for the first time, but… eh… it’s a Sharknado film. Solid nonsense.

6/10

Great White (2021) Shudder

What kind of shark? A refreshingly decent CG chonk.

How deep is the plot? 1 fathom.

Anyone famous get eaten? No.

We finish this 20-film movie masochism with Great White, a new film that explores the friendship between humans and film sharks. It’s really well shot, some lovely framing and cinematography, and the cast all do a great job, especially Katrina (Tucker & Dale) Bowden.

There’s nothing particularly earth-shattering about the script, and it’s certainly less fun than a couple of the titles on my list, but it’s nice to finish with a decent flick and without any risk of shark-induced coma.

Phew.

The Black Demon (Highland Film Group, 2023), and Under Paris (Let Me Be, 2024)

Extras

The Black Demon

It was time for another shark flick, so I jumped on Prime for The Black Demon, made some popcorn, and settled in.

An ill-tempered megalodon — a creaky oil rig off the coast of Cancun — a family hiding secrets — grizzled Mexican oil workers — a gazpacho of body parts. It would be impossible to make this boring, right? Right?

The filmmakers: “ Hold our beer.”

Featuring Josh Lucas (the forgotten brother of Patrick Wilson and Bradley Cooper), the opportunity for an over the top chompy cheese-fest is squandered, drowned by a script that wants to investigate (and talk about) Mexican superstitions and family drama. The black demon barely eats anyone, and is hardly in the film at all.
I gave it a resounding ‘harumph’ at the end.

Under Paris

Don’t sleep on this one if you like shark flicks — it’s so refreshing to watch a non-crap shark movie these days, and I was pleasantly surprised at how this had a lovely slow build up, leaned into its sci-fi premise, and then went ABSOLUTELY BONKERS.

Meg 2: The Trench (Alibaba Pictures, 2023)

Meg 2: The Trench

As good as the first film? Nope.

As bonkers as a squid on a unicycle? Yep.

Final judgement: Enjoyable, but if they get a third film there had better be more shark action. And a giant lobster.

Sharksploitation (Shudder, 2023), and Deep Blood (Variety Distribution, 1989)

Sharksploitation

What’s better than a badly acted, poorly produced, bonkers shark movie?

A documentary about shark movies!

This is a decent watch as the filmmakers go to great lengths to explain the legacy of Jaws and why the shark movie endures. Lots of great talking heads and some fun clips of good and bad (and downright terrible) movies.

If I had to gripe, it would be that I would have preferred if they’d spent about 10 mins less time talking about shark conservation, and used those 10 mins for a deeper dive into the weirder films out there.

That said, it harbors a worthwhile message about shark preservation. Check it out on Prime (Shudder or AMC+)

Deep Blood

Another shark movie crossed off the list. Deep Blood from 1989 differs from Jaws in that it has a wholly unnecessary subplot involving an ancient Native American curse. The subplot has absolutely no impact whatsoever on the story, the shark is all stock footage, and this film has the distinction of being one of the most boring films I have ever watched.

Recommended.

Shark Bait (Picaro Films, 2022)

Shark Bait

Shark Bait (Tubi) brings nothing new to the table. A bunch of unlikeable spring breakers drunkenly ‘borrow’ some jet skis, and end up in a bit of a kerfuffle when they smash them up in the middle of the ocean. To compound matters, there’s a grumpy great white in the water who apparently hates jet skis. People get eaten, final girl is plucky and resourceful, yada yada.

It’s all a bit dour, but the makeup effects are decent and the CG shark looks good when it stays in the brine. It’s OK if you’re a sharksploitation completist.

47 Meters Down (Dimension Films, 2017), and Mega-Shark vs. Giant Octopus (The Asylum, 2009)

47 Meters Down

Couldn’t sleep one night and ended up sleep-watching 47 Meters Down, which was excellent. Basically, sisters on hols, fell asleep, sisters in shark cage on boat, fell asleep, sisters in shark cage 47 meters down, fell asleep, shark-based kerfuffle, fell asleep, end credits. By all accounts, it is a decent flick and I must watch it awake.

Mega-Shark vs. Giant Octopus

Just had the last ounce of pleasure drained from watching SyFy movies with Mega-Shark vs. Giant Octopus. Now these movies are just ‘guilty’.

Previous Murkey Movie surveys from Neil Baker include:

Jumping the Shark, Part I
Jumping the Shark, Part II
Alien Overlords
Biggus Footus
I Like Big Bugs and I Cannot Lie
The Weird, Weird West
Warrior Women Watch-a-thon

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Neil Baker’s last article for us was Jumping the Shark, Part II. Neil spends his days watching dodgy movies, most of them terrible, in the hope that you might be inspired to watch them too. He is often asked why he doesn’t watch ‘proper’ films, and he honestly doesn’t have a good answer. He is an author, illustrator, outdoor educator and owner of April Moon Books (AprilMoonBooks.com).